Wednesday, September 27, 2017


I finished this book within a day - no, actually less than 20 hours. None ever recommended this book, I'm glad this book found me. It was on my iBooks for so long, only God knew when I downloaded it. As long as I can recall, I love the cover. The idea of simplicity and purity, yet seems to reach out for you as it can actually speaks its story. Maybe this was why I had it for so long. I don't know. 

So, I read it sometime around 11 p.m.-ish, scrolled down to find something to read before go to bed and I just picked it up randomly. In few pages, this book already pulled me in. Like, really made me wondering what's going on here?

Every Last Word by Tamara Ireland Stone is a book about Samantha McAllister, a popular girl at her school who is actually hiding her OCD and intrusive thoughts. She looks very normal with driving cool car, doing makeup, a swim athlete, but also mastering at acting and keeping secrets from her best friends. Not everything we see is the truth, right?

The story about mental illness, how to cope with that, how it affected our personal life, how people react to it, there are so many books about that and I've read that. But honestly, I've never read a book about mental illness this honest, raw and beautifully written before - not about OCD, at least. Correct me if I'm wrong. 

Every Last Word teaches me about how to outshine my own darkness. 

As I went going on her story deeper (because this book has first person narrative), I felt like I was here. Sam's story was very close to my heart. I felt like, at some point, I was her. Inside my head, I was repeating what really happened to me, as close to what happen to Sam on the book. The similarities we had, the intrusive thoughts, the perfect family, the best friend... It felt like my own story. The way this story is told, Stone really owns the readers. This is the book I wanted to read when I was teenager. 

The healthy and unhealthy friendships, the quick romance, the poems, the songs, the thoughts - everything connects and I love how it turns out. I love how Sam is so close to me. From all similarities we have, one thing that really matters is her friendship with Caroline. I have best friend who is literally like Caroline, very supportive, always listen to me, always makes me laugh even when she's not even trying, and most importantly, she makes me brave. I know how important it is to have someone as truthful and genuine like Caroline. I might say I'm luckier than Sam, because my Caroline is real. 

When I read the truth about Caroline, I had to stop and sent a voice note to my best friend who currently lives 5000 km away. I just had to talk to her, in a way, without actually talk to her because it would be really hard to hear her voice after what I was going through with this book. It was really tearing me apart, in a good way. 

I hope more people reading and talking about this book. It would be much better if there's a movie or perhaps tv series, because I understand not everyone loves reading. This story is important and everyone should know about it.

What's your current favorite book? Let me know. Thank you for reading! xx 


  1. you literally my favorite blogger! everything you say about makeup, movie, book, I always want it. brb going to the bookstore ;)

    thank you vera


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